Our Secret to a Long and Happy Marriage

July 18, 2015 by 1 Comment

July 1964

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Keeping romance alive, honest, open communication, companionship by sharing each others’ passions and hobbies and lastly but by no means least the union of two awfully good forgivers. We are brother and sister in the Lord, we are friends and we are lovers

Only 6% of marriages last 50 years or more according to several US Census reports. As John and I celebrate our 51st wedding anniversary today we are so thankful to be part of that 6% and give honor to God who has graced us over the years since 18th July 1964. We are what society today call “Lifers” It truly has been a triune commitment between John, myself and the Lord. 

July 2015

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When we left for our honeymoon back in 1964 it was on a motorcycle and sidecar and 51 years later we are still riding a motorcycle! Attending a motorcycle rally this past week we came across this motorcycle and sidecar. What memories!

Genesis 2:22-24 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

CHALLENGE – May seeds from the harvest of our story bear fruit in your marriage today!

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Develop a Lasting Love in Your Marriage

February 13, 2014 by Leave a Comment

As we celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary this year

          we rejoice at God’s blessing and grace on our years together.

           1964 AGAPE, PHILEO AND EROS LOVE led us to 2014

                We are brother and sister in the Lord, we are best friends and we are lovers.

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In the Greek language AGAPE – PHILEO – EROS –  are all words for love, yet each displaying a different character of love.

AGAPE – Displays the character of God for God is love. It’s the love that cannot be earned, an unconditional love with acceptance and  forgiveness.

Agape love is displayed in a marital union of two good forgivers who learn to seek forgiveness and offer forgiveness, accepting the shortcomings in each other. As both spouses move towards God they are also moving closer to each other as His character is formed in them.

It is available to us through the power of the Holy Spirit.

It is the power of being like-spirited as we pray together, minister together and serve one and other.

PHILEO – Displays the character of friendship. Unlike agape love phileo love has to be earned as it involves trust. It is earned as we learn to trust one another through communicating from the depths of our hearts. Trusting our spouses with our deep wounds, our aspirations, passions and dreams. Never leave your heart unspoken for it displays your heart to your spouse.

Your spouse should be your most trusted and best friend. A relationship where you laugh together, cry together, play together and support  each other’ dreams.

It has been said that “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.”. Friedrich Nietzsche

It is the power of being like-minded as you have fun together sharing and supporting each others’ hobbies, passions and dreams.

EROS –   Displays the character of romantic and sexual love. Eros love is like a phileo friendship love caught on fire. Keep the fire lit in your marriage and your life will be filled with warmth.

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”  ~Mignon McLaughlin

The Eros love is the only love that makes your marriage different and unique than any other relationship, that is why it is so important to keep romance alive. Light the candles, turn on the music and keep that flame burning brightly.

It is the power of physical attraction and the consummation of body, soul and spirit.

“To keep the fire burning brightly there’s one easy rule:  Keep the two logs together, near enough to keep each other warm and far enough apart – about a finger’s breadth – for breathing room.  Good fire, good marriage, same rule.”  ~Marnie Reed Crowell

 A  successful marriage needs all three “loves” to hold it together. As we love God with our body, soul and spirit, likewise we need to love our spouses with our body, soul and spirit. Now we’re talking unity!  In fact the unity in our marriage is a witness to the world of the mystical union of Christ and His church according to Ephesians 5:23

 

CHALLENGE: “A marriage is not a noun. It isn’t something you are. It is a verb. It’s the way you love your partner everyday with AGAPE, PHILEO and EROS love.

 

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Marriage is a Drama played out on the Stage of our Lives

July 17, 2012 by 1 Comment
As John and I celebrate our 48th wedding anniversary we are aware that we are living in the midst of spiritual warfare and on the frontline of battle are our marriages. For if the enemy can defeat our marriages he has got an influence over our children, the strength of the local church (for churches are only as strong as the families in the church), the moral fiber of our society and last but not least, weakening the witness are marriages should be to the mystical union twixt Christ and His Bride, the church.

Our marriages are a love story, a drama played out on a stage of opposition from the enemy, the flesh, and the influence of a fallen world. But on that same stage is played out the greatest love story ever told. The story of a heroic Knight who left the glory of His palace to seek His beloved Bride and rescue her by laying down his life willingly to save her from the hands of the opposition.

Act One: The potential Bride is created and the Father says it is very good.

Act Two: The Bride falls to the power of the enemy because of a choice pleasing to the flesh resulting in a fallen world spiraling towards destruction.

Act Three: The loving heroic Knight invades the enemy’s territory to rescue His Bride by willingly laying down His life.

Act Four: The Knight is miraculously raised from the dead and returns home to prepare a place for His rescued bride.

Act Five: In the Father’s divine plan, it is the time that He has ordained that we may play out our parts in the drama. On one side of the stage stand the enemy; the flesh and a fallen world ready to wage war against our marriages. On the other side enters our Knight, His Father and His Messenger bearing gifts of forgiveness, grace, power and love to protect, restore and strengthen our marriages. In the center on middle stage we join the drama holding the gift of choice and free will, which the Father gave us in Act One.

It doesn’t matter where we have come from or what we have done in the past with this choice. This is a brand new scene still being written and we still have the choice and the responsibility of the outcome as the curtain falls on the part we played in history. Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses in the heavenilies who are watching this drama played out with anticipated breath, are we committed to do what we can to fight for and protect the witness of our marriages?

Will we fight the enemy, deny the flesh and overcome the world?

Our marriages are more than just about us! They are about future generations; they are about being conformed to His image; they are about being a witness to a fallen world; they are about upholding the Father’s divine plan and purpose for marriage and defeating the enemy at his frontline of attack.

As the curtain falls on the last line of the scene we played, will we be saying, “ I have finished the course, I have kept the faith”, as heaven applauds, while the Father declares,  “Well done thy good and faithful servant.”

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